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Welcome to the world of the Vincent D'Onofrio obsessed - and a bit of real life thrown in.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

The Guardian

The Guardian is a left-of-centre "quality" newspaper in the UK. I often buy it - especially on Saturdays, when it has among its many sections a colour magazine - not least because one of my parrot cages is lined with newspaper rather than wood chips. My dear little Rio used to throw the wood lining out and make a real mess of the room.

There were two items of interest today. Bear with me to the end. The first is funny, but the second is, well, odd, and I'm only sorry I can't find the accompanying picture anywhere on the internet. Probably just as well, as I think it might turn a few stomachs.

Anyway, the "problem" page contains the following letter:

We're in despair. We bought two hens for the garden, but it has turned into a nightmare. They are bossy sods with strange alien eyes and weird dinosaur feet. They amuse themselves by terrorising the neighbour's cat and "singing" their special egg song at six o'clock every morning. They freak us out by pecking at the back door, so they can "be with us". Their fastidious appetites and mind control skills mean that we now spend a fortune on the special hen treats they insist on - so much so, in fact, that each egg we get now costs us roughly a tenner. And we're vegetarians, so we can't even kill or eat the feathered horrors. what can we do?

I laughed like a drain as I read this. I can just see myself in this situation if I didn't have a sleection of cats ready and willing to murder any poultry I decided to keep, not to mention the local foxes.

However, the really big surprise was on the penultimate page of the main section, where they routinely have an "Unsettling Animal Picture of the Week". It was a naked woman with a huge fish diagonally across her body, the head slightly above her right shoulder, the body hiding her fight breast and a fin almost but not quite hiding her left nipple. She is holding the tail in front of her at groin level, with a smattering of thin pubes showing.

The name of this weird woman? Great Skanky, of course. Missing Gavin, honey?




10 comments:

Eliza said...

I can't imagine my neighbours being too impressed if we got chickens, let alone the cats :-D

I've seen that picture of GS a couple of times this week and I'm still trying to get it out of my head so I'm glad you couldn't find a picture. I believe it was done to promote a film about Tuna..why she needed to be naked is a mystery

Diane said...

Tess sent me the picture of The Great Skankky with the dead fish, then it showed up in my newspaper.

Then, when I was having a grump about something, Tess kindly reminded me that at least I hadn't posed naked with a dead fish....a good point, I felt!!!

fuzzytweetie said...

I haven't seen it but, the dead fish must be symbolic of her career.

SnarkAngel said...

Can anyone blame a man for leaving a woman who covers her naked body with a dead fish and allows it to be published? Eeewwwwwwwwww!

BASRIC said...

She loves being naked...still she thinks she has the greatest body on earth. Pamela Anderson she is not she's not even Angelina or even Keira Knightley.

Her last interview she said she was going to be an ACTRESS from here on and her she is promoting a movie...naked.

THE GREAT SKANKKY.

jazzy said...

bless the dead fish for covering her. the last thing on earth i want to see is greta's naked body.

Diane said...

Perhaps we should offer our sympathies to the fish....????

Tess said...

I admire people who have causes, but I really didn't need to see her naked.

VDO'obessed said...

What was the point of her being naked?? I could understand it if it was about fur or something, but fish? I'm sorry I must've missed the latest fish scale fashions straight from Paris.

There are better ways to draw attention to the problem without making a laughingstock of yourself.

Vince said...

Great blog.....

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