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Welcome to the world of the Vincent D'Onofrio obsessed - and a bit of real life thrown in.

Sunday, June 21, 2015

Seveonaks - home of the devil

Sevenoaks is expensive to live in. It considers itself a superior commuter town. So of course the number of Chelsea tractors per square inch is large. (For those of you not familiar with this term it refers to 4x4s, SUVs, Land Rovers etc.)

I lost count of those I saw in the small, overcrowded, inadequate car park there the other day. But it was one of the slightly less bulky monsters that decided to make it impossible for me to get in my car and leave.

Going in at an angle, he left me about 14 inches at the front end, decreasing to about 8 inches at the back. I couldn't even squeeze up to the door, which is very wide, let alone open it. As for climbing in - only if I turned myself into a lquid and someone poured me in.

I asked the car park attendant to give me some advice. He couldn't find the driver or move either vehicle, but he was empowered to give the driver a ticket (yay, £35, doubled if he doesn't pay within two weeks) and then a very kind gentleman climbed in through the passenger door, edged across and rolled my car out of the space. Thunderbirds we are go!.

The new Marks and Spencer in posh Sevenoaks had a great selection of vegetarian BBQ items that my impoverished local store (which is at least twice the size...) doesn't bother to stock. Don't bother trying to find out why, you never get a straight answer from them about their prejudice against to impecunious vegetarian. Believe me, I've tried repeatedly over many years.

Seveoaks is less than 25 miles from my home, and getting there usually takes between 30 and 45 minutes. But on Friday, getting back was a bit of a problem.

The dreaded M25 motorway that  encircles London was on an even slower go-slow than usual. I spotted a tail-back at Junction 4 (no warning signs even though it resulted from a crash in the tunnel under the Thames at Junction 1 many hours earlier) so I left the motorway to take the A road home. ALong with several hundred thousand other people, apparently, because the journey home took 2 hours!

I don't think I'll be going to Seveoaks again any time soon.

The Consoler

Icky icky nasty episode with slimey villains.

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