Give Us A Break!

It's been a manic two days - it would have been quieter and easier to be at work!

Yesterday I had a hospital appointment about my shoulder injury (when I had an argument with a pavement last October - the physio hasn't worked). The doctor was late, and the first patient took an age. Meanwhile, I was sitting in an airless corridor on a boiling hot day thinking I would die of thirst.

The doctor gave me two cortisone injections in the shoulder to see if it would sort out my rotator cuff (no luck so far). Then I went to a DIY store to look for "storage ideas" for my chicken supplies. I came home with three heavy-duty plastic containers.

Back home I made a valliant attempt to sort out my patio and make room for the chicken coop. I emptied a few pots (on to the garden, no waste here) but I wanted to actually get rid of as many pots as I could, which meant lumping them into the front garden for people to help themselves to. As they are made of concrete this was not an easy task. Some I just can't lift any more.

Today I woke up at 5am for no good reason, and as I couldn't get back to sleep, I was up soon after 6am. I went to the garden centre to fill up with chicken supplies. Not having enough work to do putting together the coop, I bought a potting bench, with the idea that if I put my new containers on it, I could keep the chicken feed where I can reach it without bending down all the time. I have to kill myself to save a few crouches. Great!

Next it was off to do my weekend shopping and feed the ducks. Lunch was short and sweet in a department store cafe where I am a regular, and so always have a welcome from the staff.

The 10-15 minutes assembly time for the coop was about 2 hours (though to be fair I did have a couple of lengthy phone calls as well - they gave me an excuse for a welcome rest) and the instructions were - er - instructive. For a non-language speaker. ANY language.

There was also a whole chunk missing about putting in the middle section, so the newly tightened screws got untightened a couple of times. I think the ladder was supposed to be fixed under the threshhold, but not being a two-foot contortionist, I couldn't manage that, so the fixings are on top.

Tomorrow it would be nice to relax, but I managed to leave some stuff at the garden centre checkout, so I have to get washed and properly dressed (not my usual slobby Sunday behaviour) and go and collect them. Then I have to clear some more room and erect the potting bench.

Why did I want to get chickens again?

What's in a Face?

Concern


Frustration


Bafflement


Alarm


Secrecy

Fatigue

And let's not forget sexiness in the extreme.

Should have been Graansha tonight, but the folder appears to be empty. It's one of the last episodes I capped, so it really should be there.

His Best Side?

Do we need a poll?

We've had back and front

Now it's time for sideways.






















I'll take him any way.

No Captions Today

Well, why bother when I can offer you this little gem?

Expressions

What an expressive face our lovely man has.

Amused.


Daring.


Thoughtful.


Mocking.


Contemptuous.

Those arms aren't bad either...

What's in a name?

I am already thinking about names for my new girls, even before I've met them.

I have a few favourites: Clara, Rosie, Poppy, Ruby, Lulu are a few of those I've considered. A batch of three that somehow go well together for whatever reason, are memorable, and catchy, escapes me, however.

Any ideas?

This is a contented rescued hen from

the British Hens Welfare Trust

in ecstacy having a dusbath.

Aaaaah!

On The Way

I've done it! I've put my name down for some rescue hens. I've also ordered this combined coop and run, which has much better wire than any other coop I've seen. More protection against the foxes that have decided to choose this time to move back into the area.

The coop will be on my patio, so young Reynard will not be able to dig underneath. It looks huge, but it's only 2'6" wide, 3'6" high, and 5'6" long, including the nest box.

I collect my three girls on Saturday 29th May.

All I have to do now is try to be here to receive my parcel, then put the coop together. (They reckon 10-15 minutes. Right.)

Best Position

You choose:


Squatting?


Perched?


Sitting back-to-front on a chair?


Standing?

Or sitting in a bright red Ferrarri with a silly grin on his face?

Tough one.

Chapter 2

I've just published the latest chapter here:

http://aftermajorcase.blogspot.com/

Inside Out?

No.

Back


to Front and


Neck


and Neck.

That's Handy

Whether on their own or combined with other parts of him, whether gloved or (gasp!) naked, those hands are worthy of a fan club dedicated just to them.

"Mmm, that fragrance reminds me where my fingers have been."


You put your left hand in...


The towelette thingy.


The electronic gizmo.


Complete with caller I/D.

Me Want!

I'm in serious trouble. Today at the garden centre, instead of just buying the great garden swing I saw, I wandered on down the outside displays and came upon a new addition - hen houses complete with HENS!!!

Apart from the ones bullying the ones being bullied, they were just adorable. I still have a big hole in my heart from losing my darling Henry last summer, but I could never get another African grey, because it wouldn't be him.

When I was a little kid, my parents kept chickens, and I can just about remember them and the crowing cock. It was still soon enough after the war for a lot of town dwellers still to have some chickens. But I have no idea about looking after them, or what they would need.

I'm drawn towards rescuing some battery hens. Farmers wear them out with constant laying in tiny cages inside artificially lit sheds. Their life is a nightmare. Then they go to be slaughtered.

But there are charities that buy them from farmers and rehome them so they can have a few happy weeks, months or (hopefully) years before meeting a more natural end.

A recovering battery hen.

The trouble is, I would not be able to let them range free except in my presence, and that may not be enough. Also, positioning a henhouse with run might be tricky in my "natural" (ie. overrun) garden, which is "designed" to be a wildlife haven - including foxes...

This is going to take a lot of thought and planning.

So Thoughtful

Don't be jealous, Vixens - Bobby has decided to get me a gift.

"What could I get Val?


I'll phone around to get some ideas.


Maybe she'd like a bit of tongue.


I've searched through this gift list, no luck.


Maybe the tongue with the blue shirt, the shoulders and the eyelashes?


OK, a double helping of groin then.





I could just give her my credit card and let her get something for herself."

You're very generous, sweety, but you don't have to spend a penny. The things you have already offered are plenty for me.

A Very Interesting Person

Challenge of the millennium: choose between the first six pictures. (I think we would all like to offer Bobby some help in managing his little clothes problem...)

A.


B.


C.


D.


E.


F.


Woof!


Purr!