The End of Season 6

Best belly shot ever.

A big back for Basric to climb.

You don't need a ladder to get into those hard-to-reach places when Det. Goren is around.

"My mom wants to meet you. She thinks we're an item."

Eames: "And that's funny because...?"

Bobby does his "dumb" look to appease Eames's sulk.

He can't keep it up, though.

Eventually he gives up in despair.

Bobby enters a "most handsome man" competition...

...against himself. And wins.

Overcome with modesty, he tries to win the gurning* competition instead,

He now needs me to comfort him for winning that as well.

*Gurning - pulling faces, the uglier the better, usually won by people with their false teeth out.

US VIXENS THIS IS TRUE!

LOCI date?

I just got a Google alert that says the new series will begin on Thursday Feb 5th at 9pm.

PLEEEAASE let it be so!

The Considerate Cat

This is Amber.

She is a very thoughtful cat. She wolfs down every morsel of food she possibly can, before anyone else can get it.

Then she throws it straight back up into the dish.

Except the other day, when she hawked it up on my bed.

Maybe she's just bulimic. So am I actually. I stuff myself with food - but I forget to throw up.

I'm also anorexic. Anorexic people look in the mirror and see a fat person. QED.

The Man with the Rocket in his Pocket

Ah, the light grey suit.

"OMG this guy is SO boring and I really want to yawn."

Bobby volunteers for the hand and Python measuring competition.

Bobby uses the grey suit to show off his shoulders,

Having won the hand and Python competition, Bobby accepts his prize coyly.

And of course, no Rocketman display would be complete without

the Python Parade by the REAL Rocketman.

Happy New Year

Make a Smilebox greeting

Sorry I didn't know how to get rid of the track that came with the card, but at least Lennon drowns it out!

Naughty Lions

I've been watching a programme called Lion Man recently. It's about a bloke called Craig Busch who has opened a big cat sanctuary in New Zealand. He has amazing relationships with his cats, who obviously love him and miss him when he's away.

He's particularly interested in breeding white lions and white Royal Bengal tigers, and four white lion cubs are being raised with three white tiger cubs. Here is a bit of film taken when he and one of his regular builders were doing improvements to an enclosure.



By the way, at the zoo on Monday I heard, not for the first time, someone talking about white tigers as being Siberian tigers. I suppose they think of snowy Siberia and snow and make an assumption. But at least that's better than the woman who, looking at a serval, said, "I think that's a meerkat"!

Talking Hands

With such wonderful hands, both Vincent and Bobby should be very expressive using sign language. Of course, just like Chinese, French and German, Bobby speaks it. Badly.

"Are you denying my talents?"

Only your linguistic ones, darling.

Bobby uses his long arms to help him goose the drug dealer.

Bobby gets ready for a game of leapfrog, but even bending over

he's much too big for Eames to reach.

Bobby is so broad in the shoulders that Eames finds herself

elbowed out of her seat in the interrogation room.

Bobby plots his revenge after Eames reports him to the Captain

for taking up too much space.

"If I hide my lips behind my hand, the Vixens won't have anything to lust over."

Wrong!

In an effort to empathise with the deaf community, Bobby covers his eyes.

Er - should be your EARS, Bobby. Bit difficult to read sign language like that.

Bobby is given a talking to for refusing to shrink to a more manageable size.

No, Bobby, Mafia gestures do NOT count as sign language.

The two detectives have a tiff over who gets Eames.

English for Advanced Users

Actually, it's a bit of basic use of Cockney Rhyming Slang.

I thought I'd retell my adventures at the zoo using a few words that used to be common currency in London, but are sadly falling into disuse.

"On Monday, as it was really brass monkeys, my boat got really red. I went to have a butchers at the titfers. I fancied a pint down at the rub-a-dub but I settled for a cup of Rosie."

Need a hand translating?

boat = boat race = face
butchers = butcher's hook = look
titfer = tit-for-tat = hat
rub-a-dub = rub-a-dub-dub = pub
Rosie = Rosie Lee = tea

All clear? Good!

Bobby is not...

...his Brother's Keeper. Though he might like to be. Better for Frank if he were.

"Who put this damn logo on my back?"

"Was it you? This is getting beyond a joke."

"Now it's on my shoulder. I give up."

"That's weird. It can float by itself in the air."

"Ha, ha! Now it's got my brother."

"If you want it on there, you'll have to stretch it to this size."

"I'm happy with it as a badge on my breast pocket, doctor.

Please don't make me have it tattooed - you know where. Ouch!"

Three provocative poses.

See, they got it on there in the end, they just had to do it from a distance to make the two fit together.

English Lesson

That's English from England, as opposed to any other variant spoken around the world.

Firstly, "Quiff".
This is probably an age thing. I'm sure that bit of hair sticking out in front on male teddy boys/rock-and-rollers in the 1950s and early 1960s was well known on both sides of the Atlantic.

Then, "Brass Monkeys".
This is an abbreviation of "cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey", referring to very cold weather.

Finally, "Knackered".
1. Broken, worn out - eg. My car is 10 years old and it's knackered.
2. Exhausted - eg. I've been on my feet all day and I'm knackered.

The "quiff" is on account of Fenwayspal (innocent young thing) asking what a quiff is.

The rest is to describe my day. I went to the Zoo. It was very sunny, but it was brass monkeys, and I had to buy a hat and gloves before I froze. (This is the "me" who wears teeshirts and no coat outdoors almost all the time.) Now I'm absolutely knackered.

Meanwhile, we have reached Albatross.

"I scrabble through the dirt, and Eames just swans off. "

"Er, no I wash not dwinking lass night."

Bobby whistles to cover up the sound of his peeing up a tree.

"No, Eames, your bum doesn't look big in that, honestly (hee,hee,hee)."

Bobby makes eyes at the lady judge in the hope of convicting SWMNBN next time round.

Alex and Bobby watch in disbelief as the Vixens invade the set.

Eames wins the "pull a silly face" contest.

Bobby keeps trying, but just looks kissable.

"Whose idea was the Van Der Graaf generator?

I'll never get my hair to lie flat again."

Bobby treads in something even he finds unpleasant.

Back to 1971

Once before I posted some Morecambe and Wise - the show in which The Beatles appeared.

The other night their 1971 Christmas show was shown.

Just to be clear for non-British readers, Morecambe and Wise were a brilliant comedy duo, whose Christmas shows were consistently the most-viewed broadcasts of the festive season. Big stars queued up to be invited on their shows.

In this clip, the eminent classical musician Andre Previn (at the time probably Mr Mia Farrow) conductor of one of the top London orchestras, is publicly humiliated by the comics.

Happy Privilege Day, Jazzy

Tomorrow is Jazzy's birthday, and while I was selecting pictures from Privilege to post, I noticed that Bobby was taking far too much notice of her in many of them.

"Which do you think she'd like best, a gift or flowers?"

"I left her gift over there. Who's moved it?"

"I was going to get down on one knee to propose, but..."

"So which one of you is Jazzy, exactly?"

"You gave Jazzy the gift I bought! You're a dead man!"

"Don't look so proud of him, you're next."

"This pose is just for you."

Hands up those who want to help Jazzy unwrap the Python - er, I mean, her gift?

"Well, if Jazzy won't hug me to keep me warm, I'll do it myself."

"I want to hold your hand."

"Here's the birthday girl! Hooray! Applause!"

"Did I overdo it? Are you embarrassed?!